Love is just a word until you find someone who will give its definition..

jivi and sashi both woke me up today morning...
they wanted me to go online as guru was waiting for me...
i was suppose to give him my answer on whether i wan him o not by 9...

i wen online...
saw him online...
he asked my answer...
n i cud only say...
i din wan this relationship anymore...

but he kept begging..
so i jus kept running away from his questions...
i was hurt...
n seeing him hurt was even more hurting...

ended up in cck ard 3 plus...
met momo n sashi...
n proceeded to go meet the rest...
we waited for selvi's side to arrive for like 1 hour..

i was totally speechless wen i saw her questioning guru on why he led her on...
i cud see exactly how hurt she really was...
like how she came in between me n him...
now...
i'm the one in between him n her.

wen i saw selvi crying...
my hart jus gave up...
i cudnt see a gal who was 15...
who din noe the real meaning of love...
crying...
i almost gave up wen sangee n my sis gave me a look...
the looked which was even more powerful than anything else...
there they were fighting on my behalf...
n i jus giving up...
i had to show face for my dear ones...
so i jus remained silent...

at the end..
she just walked off telling me tat i cud keep him to myself...
n dat she wun interfere anymore...
n i have nothing left to add to tat...

after tat...
i wen on to tok to guru alone..
started off with a lil bit of confrontations...
but ended up else where....

in a relationship..
love and attention is a give and take policy....
if i dun give him attention he wun give me either...
he wud rather give it to someone else n get it back from tat someone else...
dats wat i concluded...
which was why this mess has happened...
haix...

n everything ended with me saying i love you but i dun trust you...
afterall...
wats the point in having a relationship if theres no trust...?
if he happens to tell me tat that he was gonna meet jivi o someone after school...
do think i'm gonna trust him...??
wun dere be even a 1% doubt if he was gonna be with another gal...
i'm confused...
i'm simply hurt and confused...
What more does a man need then an understanding girlfriend who feels for him and loves him unconditionally regardless of the lesser times he spends with her ....